#TipForTonight – Home Spa

If after our first post, you are unable to take your wife to a hotel, why not try giving her a hotel/spa experience at home?  A few steps could induce the same relaxation and freedom of staying in a hotel without the obvious benefit of being somewhere else.

  1. Tidy the bedroom so it’s spotless.  Fresh white sheets if possible.  Absolutely zero clutter.
  2. Get her a spa robe.  Extra points if it’s soft and warm.  Use a dryer or radiator.
  3. Have lots of spare towels in the house.  There are cheap ones in IKEA.  Only problems is they don’t last long.  However they’re always good for point number 3 and for relaxing about making a mess during sex.
  4. If you have space for it, buy a massage table.  They fold away and are about £60 on Amazon.
  5. Get some massage oils.  I don’t need to tell you what to do with that.
  6. Dim the lights or turn them off and use scented candles.  Easy way to build up that spa atmosphere.
  7. When giving her a massage, play a spa playlist from Youtube.  There are many 1 hour videos with that relaxing massage music.
  8. Every Christmas time, a lot of shops stock fancy looking “spa products” at “discount prices” because they make easy gifts.  Buy some to use at home.  Let’s be honest, a lot of us don’t know what’s in those products you pay big money for in the spa.  Sometimes if it looks fancy, that’s all that matters.  If you want to spend a bit of money but not too much, ask for help with giving a home spa experience at the Body Shop.  They do have nice products at mid-range prices.
  9. Feel free to nab those little bottles and toiletries you get when you do go to hotels.  Bringing them out do add a light-hearted realism to the atmosphere you’re trying to build
  10. Fold the toilet roll in the toilet into that little triangle like they do in hotels to let you know they’ve serviced your room.
  11. Print your own little room service menu but with a twist like only one meal (dinner you’ve cooked), her favourite local takeaways, or sexual acts.  Then ask her to order from the menu when she’s ready.
  12. If you can, meet her at the door like a hotel receptionist/bellboy/concierge.  She will laugh at you but she will relax.

 

Any other tips for giving a hotel/spa experience at home?  Post it below!

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How To Get Free Stuff When You Take Your Wife To A Hotel

Husbands of London,

I don’t recommend lying, cheating and stealing but here are some tips that could boost your hotel stay if you know how to behave.

Unfortunately most people still believe husbands and feckless partners due to the kind of husbands you see on television (and maybe some real life examples!).  This works to the advantage of those of us who do go the extra mile.

So if you ever do take your wife on holiday or even just check into a hotel for a dirty weekend here’s how you play it to get free stuff from the hotel.

  1. Never approach the reception desk to check-in with your wife.  Ask her to sit in the lobby and get comfortable whilst you handle things.
  2. Be courteous and personable to the reception staff.  Most of them are bored out of their minds from repeating the same tasks.  People rarely ask those in the service industry how they are.
  3. Explain that you’re trying to do something nice and special for your wife.  There are many obvious special occasions like her birthday or wedding anniversary, but sometimes just saying “she’s been stressed lately and I’m taking her away to relax” is enough to paint the picture of what you’re trying to achieve
  4. Think about who you’re speaking to.  If it’s a male receptionist, he will automatically identify with you and will relate more with the task of pleasing your woman.  If it’s a female receptionist, she will most likely identify with your wife and appreciate the thought and sentiment of you wanting to please your woman.  Either way, they tend to be happy to go the extra mile for you.
  5. Play a little dumb.  Here’s where the feckless husband routine helps you.  If you come in like you expect something they will make you spend your money.  If you ask questions like “Is there anything you could do to help me make it special for her?” then your selflessness will inspire them to help you.

Now, I must stress again that none of this is guaranteed and the hotel do not “owe” you any extras.  However, it’s always a good idea to ask.  It’s less likely to work in budget hotels.  However, if you’ve paid a bit of a premium for a nice hotel, they are more willing (and capable) to go the extra mile.

If you book Hilton hotels through the website, they tend to have a box for extra notes.  Feel free to write in there “It’s …….. anything you could do to make it extra special is much appreciated”.  Your receptionist will see this on their screen as they check you in.

Bear in mind, if the Mrs is taking you away for your birthday for example, she can do the same for you.

Since being married to Mrs GB, I have done this a number of times and we have received:

  • a free dinner in Amsterdam
  • a free dinner in Phoenix, Arizona
  • an upgrade to a Suite in Las Vegas
  • an upgrade to a Executive Suite in Dubai
  • Free Cava in Barcelona
  • Free Champagne and cake in Rotterdam
  • Free Sparkling Wine and cake in Miami (Mrs. GB arranged it for my birthday)
  • Free Fruit Platter and Cava in Mallorca

Have you ever blagged any freebies from a hotel?  What are your methods?  Share it with the lads below.

Mr. GB

ps. Make sure you sign-up to the Inner Circle mailing list to get the stuff that won’t be on the website!